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What Makes a Healthy Relationship?

Keeping your Relationship Healthy

Healthy relationships are built on a foundation of communication and trust. Frequent communication with your partner will keep the relationship positive for both participants. The 5 guidelines below can help you keep your relationship healthy:

Speak your mind - If something is bothering you, it's much better to talk about it instead of keeping it to yourself.
Respect each other - Your partner's ideas and desires are just as important as yours. Try to always make a healthy effort to keep both your ideas and your partner's ideas in mind.
Compromise - Disagreements are a natural part of most relationships, but it's best to find ways to compromise. Try to solve conflicts in a fair and rational way.
Be supportive - Offer reassurance and encouragement to your partner, and let your partner know when you need their support. Healthy relationships are about building each other up, not putting each other down.
Give each other space - While it's common to want to spend all of your time together, it's important to also give each other space.

Healthy Boundaries

Setting boundaries can help you and your partner get what you want out of your relationship. Boundaries can help you clearly communicate what helps you feel comfortable and respected when you're with your partner.

Creating boundaries doesn't mean you don't trust or love your partner -- or that you're hiding anything. In an intimate sexual relationship, a good place to start could be discussing what you are comfortable with sexually. It can often be easier to talk about your boundaries before things get physical.

Healthy boundaries shouldn’t restrict your ability to:

Go out with your friends without your partner.
Participate in activities and hobbies you like.
Keep passwords to your email, social media accounts or phone private.
Respect each others' likes and needs.

Navigating Disagreements

It's normal to have arguments with your partner, but it's critical to handle them maturely and healthily. Here are some steps you can take to navigate these disagreements respectfully:

Choose the right time - Try not to start an important conversation if you both don't have enough time to finish the conversation fully. Leaving things unresolved can make the situation feel worse.
Try to use "I" and "we" statements instead of "you" statements - Phrasing your feelings this way helps keep what you are saying from feeling like an attack or an assumption.
Take a break if you get angry - It's ok to feel angry sometimes, but it's never ok to take out your anger on your partner no matter how frustrated you get. If you feel yourself getting angry, try taking a break and returning to the conversation when you feel more calm.
Stay focused - Try not to let the argument drift into other arguments that aren't related to the first conversation.
Assume best intentions - In a healthy relationship, neither you nor your partner want to hurt each other. While you might be having an argument, remember you're on the same side.

Qualities of Healthy Relationships

You trust your partner and feel respected by them.
You feel like you can “just be yourself” with your partner without having to look or act a certain way.
Neither person would be “destroyed” if the relationship ends.
You are not afraid to say what you really think or feel and why you think or feel that way.
You do not have to be together 24/7.
Neither person attempts to control or change the other person.
Both people already feel good about themselves and don’t need a relationship to feel they are okay.
You both accept the other’s friends and families without jealousy.
You negotiate the level of preferred expression of affection (kind words, physical touch, etc.) in both public and private.
You like to really hear what your partner thinks and feels.
You do not pull away from the rest of the world, isolating yourselves as a couple.
You encourage self-sufficiency and high self-esteem in the other person.
You do not use physical violence either playfully or to resolve conflict.

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What Makes a Healthy Relationship?